Bears love hot dogs, believe it or not. Every afternoon we got in my car and drove to Dairy Queen to get some of those horrid weenies. I couldn't eat after watching each bear demolish a stack of greasy boiled dogs. Also, I hate DQ. But one time as a prank I slipped a wee little dachshund into their mountain of Hot Doggies, and they ripped him to shreds as they explored the miniature frankfurter kingdom.
They were horrified by my twisted sense of humor. I nervously laughed and pulled the ole "C'mon guys, it 'twas but a jest!" routine. One started to chuckle under his breath but quickly shut up after another bear elbowed him in the lower back. Man, I really hate DQ.
The biggest one picked me up by the leg and held me upside down as each bear took their turn of punching me to bits. Every so often they would pause to scream in my general direction, "Cry! Cry for that hound!" and then commence to beat the hell out of me.
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